Tag Archives: Conservatives

Stephen Harper is a C*nt

1 Apr

And I’m shocked by how many people don’t seem to know it. I mean, seriously, look at this guy:

Oh yes, it's real.

It would seem that in an effort to avoid looking like he’s holding a puppy, Harper has decided to hold a kitten. This is like when I’m walking my dog and I tell her that it’s time to go home, but she tries to be tricksy by pretending that she’s sniffing at the ground like she’s gonna take a piss and then slowly beginning to walk in a different direction from home hoping that I won’t notice.

Trust me, dog, you’re not pulling a fast one on me.

Trust me, Stephen Harper, even a kitten can’t hide what a spunkdervish you are. Even your sweaters failed. But damn were they funny. And they give your opposition some great material:

Let’s start with a point that’s close to home for me.

Stephen Harper hates women.

Why? Well I don’t know why. But scrapping universal daycare; cancelling the court challenges program (because who really cares if we violate the Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms?); removing abortion from Canada’s G8 maternal health funding (“67,000 women die every year? Pfft, I eat more Cheerios for breakfast”); and revoking women’s right to vote all make a pretty clear statement on how Harper feels about the ladies.

Okay, maybe not that part about taking away voting rights. The first three are bad enough anyway.

Next, Harper hates the environment.

I don’t even want to talk about what happened in Copenhagen. It makes me want to throw up. He basically gave Kyoto the finger and not only has Canada NOT reduced our greenhouse gas emissions since then, they’ve actually risen by 26%. Our role in Copenhagen was so thoroughly disgusting that it prompted Ben Wikler of Avaaz.org to award Canada with the Fossil of the Year Award and this scathing comment:

“Fossil of the Year goes to CANADA, for bringing a totally unacceptable position into Copenhagen and refusing to strengthen it one bit. Canada‚Äôs 2020 target is among the worst in the industrialized world, and leaked cabinet documents revealed that the governments is contemplating a cap-and-trade plan so weak that it would put even that target out of reach.”

Which leads to my last point: Harper and his government have made Canada the laughing stock of the democratic world.

Ramesh Thakur through the Australian:
“Edmund Burke noted that all that was necessary for evil to triumph was for good men to do nothing. At a time when Arabs risk life and limb for political freedoms, Canadians seem largely apathetic about the erosion of their democracy.”

George Monbiot of the Guardian (UK):
“This country’s government is now behaving with all the sophistication of a chimpanzee’s tea party.”

Even Obama knows what’s up:

Trust me, you don't want to see.

I should probably say that I do make a distinction between Harper the Politician and Harper the Person. I’m sure that Harper the Person is very nice. He probably really does love kittens and sweater vests. Maybe he even hugs a tree sometimes. And he had to be good with the ladies somehow because, seriously, his wife is HOT:

How did he do THAT?

It’s Harper the Politician I hate. Harper the Prime Minister. Harper the Leader of the Conservative Party of Canada. It’s the Harper who has made me hang my head when facing the rest of the world on environmental issues, who made me even more afraid as a woman in Canada (especially if I get raped–thanks asshole), and who has turned our democracy into a joke with his suspensions of Parliament, concealment of information, and outright lies, prompting a majority of MPs to vote that they believed the government was in contempt of Parliament (the first time in Canadian history) and ultimately leading to the federal election on May 2nd.

There are literally 100 reasons not to vote for Harper’s Conservative Party. But the number one reason for me was, is, always has been and always will be one thing:

Stephen Harper is a cunt.