Why I’m Not Married

5 Mar

HA! I bet you thought you were gonna learn something interesting about me, didn’t you? Nope, I’m just gonna talk statistics again.


But seriously. I’m 25. I wouldn’t classify myself as physically beautiful, but I’m most certainly cute. I believe myself to be an internally beautiful person. I’ve got lots of love, I accept people for who they are as much as I can, my hobby is laughing, I’m almost dysfunctionally non-confrontational, I enjoy the bedroom, and I like to think of myself as quite intelligent (shut up Nathan). I’ve got some bloody good qualities.

Given, I’ve got some pretty crap ones, too. I’m a procrastinator, I’m terrible at dealing with money, I turn into a bit of an argumentative bitch when I’m too drunk, I occasionally drink too much, I suck at keeping my room clean, I can be incredibly intolerant towards people I love, and I’m quite vindictive and petty when the situation warrants. Sometimes even if it doesn’t.

In the end though, I’m not such a bad person (shut up Nathan). I think (hope) that my good qualities outweigh (or at least slightly nullify) my bad qualities.

Yet–I’ve been single for almost 10 years.

Yup, you read that right: 10. Not a typo.

I’ve been “involved” with people, and there have even been some people that I’ve truly cared about or had emotional investments in. But I haven’t had a “boyfriend” in 10 years.

So, what’s the deal?

Now before the feminists rip my head off and turn it into a march banner, let me just state that I haven’t been unhappy. In fact, I’ve been quite the opposite. One of the reasons I’ve been single for this long is that I haven’t needed someone else. I’m perfectly happy the way I am, and unless you’re going to up my level of happiness, why the hell would I change this state of affairs?

But it does make me stop and question myself from time to time. Really–because 10 years is a pretty freakin’ long time.

And this is where Tracy McMillan and her article in the Huffington Post come in. Aptly and/or stingly entitled “Why You’re Not Married”, McMillan presented the piece as an over-the-top, true-but-not-totally-true, brutal thump of honesty. The reaction was a little extreme (as I’m sure McMillan meant it to be), prompting an interview with the writer herself.

In the interview, McMillan points out that her article was meant to be satire, but I almost feel robbed by this assertion. Screw that! Her piece was brilliant, brutal, and bang-bloody-on. I almost peed myself laughing it was so funny.

Check it out. And I will tell you: one of the points most definitely explains my singledom.

What about you?


2 Responses to “Why I’m Not Married”

  1. Kaare March 17, 2011 at 5:12 pm #

    Haha, that article is outta hand.

    And you’re sweet, honey. Happiness is all that matters in the end. Find it how you will, ya know?

    • Angie Pants March 29, 2011 at 8:29 am #

      Yeah, I think that’s the whole point in the end. The article she wrote was actually pointed at women who are single but don’t want to be. It just so happened that I fit into one of the categories as well. You should read it and guess which category.

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